Sometimes.. when we get too caught up with busyness.. we suddenly forgot to reflect.. feel or think abt god... we just get self-focused.. thinking abt self-glorifying... however.. at the end of the day.. we can also get discouraged cos the end result wont be pleasing to god...

sometimes... i wonder.. whether when we do certain things in life.. is it out of guilt or pleasing to men? will we feel satisfied after we encourage people or do we do it out of guilt... sometimes i struggle to balance... i genuinely want to be there.. to support and encourage... yet.. sometimes.. after i share.. did things.. i reflect.. den i would be so guilty.. guilty why i did what i did.. without thinking of the consequences... this is me lor... always do.. den sometimes.. din jam brake... end up damage done.. but well.. i m learning.. slowly learning the process.. of enjoying the things i do or share to people.. encouraging or taking them higher.. and not feeling bad that i did it wrong.... i need to learn to do it out of pleasing god and not men....in everything we do... be it in our studies.. our friendship with one another.. or caring for our family.. we need to do it out of love and not obligations....

i m beginning to appreciate little things that god place in my life... things tt often neglected yet when i slow down and obvious... i m grateful... grateful for having such a flexible timetable.. that allows me to organise my time well.. to do things i like and even have lunch with my family.. something that i long for when i stayed in hostel for the past 2 years.... i need to learn to be more appreciative to the things my parents do for me.. and stop taking them for granted....

i might not be good in sharing my thoughts out in words.. verbally.. but it is also good for me to learn.. i just enjoy sharing randomly... and that is just me... i need to accept who i m... how insecure i can be... god still loves me... i wanna share to all who knows me too...

good nitey! =)